Long description:

The heartfelt, witty and inspiring first and only autobiography from one of Britain's most beloved celebrities.

'Raw and revelatory' Sunday Times
'Showbiz memoir of the year' Daily Express
'A rip roaring and honest story that pulls absolutely no punches' Best
'A treasure trove of gems which even Elton John would be jealous of.' Daily Mirror

You think you already know all there is to know about Vanessa? You don't know the half of it.

Brace yourself for the achingly funny, deeply moving untold story: the behind-the-scenes lowdown on the parents who planned her wedding before she could walk, how she became the nation's second-most-famous fat person, life as the British Oprah, feuding with Madonna and Miss Piggy aboard the Big Breakfast bed, an excruciatingly public divorce, gruesome gastric band surgery, a sixteen-year skirmish with an ageing boybander and finding herself shockingly single at sixty-one.

She's spent thirty-five years in the public eye and now, for the first time, Vanessa seizes her chance to set the record straight in this warm, witty, intensely human story. She spares no one's blushes, including her own. How could someone so clever make such cataclysmic mistakes?

Vanessa's often wrong, but always relatable. She puts the 'Oh my goodness, I can never unread that paragraph!' into celebrity autobiography.