Communication as an Art of Living by Poerksen, Bernhard; Schulz von Thun, Friedemann;

Short description:

Friedemann Schulz von Thun and Bernhard Poerksen, two prominent representatives of communication psychology and media studies, provide an introduction to modern communication psychology.

Long description:

How can we listen better to each other? How can we offer criticism without being hurtful? Why do communication recipes never work? In this book, Friedemann Schulz von Thun and Bernhard Poerksen, two prominent representatives of communication psychology and media studies, provide an introduction to modern communication psychology.

Written in dialogic form to be both humorous and serious, this book explores questions around communication and relationships, as well as around communication and the inner self. It presents easy‑to‑understand and practical communication models that can be adapted for a variety of settings, from coaching and teaching to mediation to consultancy.

Designed to help people communicate more successfully, this engaging book will be useful for therapists, counselors, coaches, and professional groups who want to improve communication for themselves and their teams.
It will also be of interest to students of Communication Psychology and Communication Science.

“This book brings into view the programmatic core of humanistic psychology. Rather than focusing on defects, deficiencies, and pathologies, it recognizes and concentrates on opportunities for personal growth and on human potential. Bernhard Poerksen and Friedemann Schulz von Thun offer communication tools for everyone – paving the way toward better communication and perhaps also to a better life. Fascinating.”

Michael Murphy, Co-founder of Esalen Institute, the birthplace of the Human Potential Movement

Table of Contents:

Praise for the German Edition

Preface

The Dialogic Principle: A Preface by Bernhard Poerksen

I.             The Big Questions

1.     The Communication Square

            Searching for the key sentence

            The power of the receiver

            Hermeneutics of the listener

            In praise of misunderstanding

            History of an idea

            Of humans and machines

            Application of a model

2.     Maxims of Comprehensibility

            The practice of parody

            The four comprehensibility dimensions

            Karl Popper’s taunts

            The three-world typology

            The limits of communication

3.     Vicious Circles and Relationship Dynamics

            No beginning and no end

            Victims and perpetrators

            Power comes from obedience

            No more either-or

            The simultaneity of different things

            Autonomy and dependence

            The double focus

           Theory and biography

4.     The Ideal of Congruence

            The narcissistic dilemma

            The primal need of the soul

            Abraham Maslow’s rant

            Maximum and optimum authenticity

            True to self and situation

            The situation model

            Higher-order sovereignty

            From norm to option

            Leading a congruent life

5.     Communication with the Inner Self

            The parallelism proposition

            Self-paralysis and self-sabotage

            The charisma puzzle

            Stages of self-clarification

            A pluralism-friendly attitude

            Against exile

            The power of metaphor

6.     The Values Square and Views of Human Nature

The third quality

A guide to dialectical thinking

Farewell to one-sidedness

Varieties of integration

Human nature

Freedom and conditionability

Stanley Milgram’s experiment

II.          The Concrete Questions

1.     Communication Psychology for Managers and Executives

            Double-vision consultancy

            Triple pressure

            The integral leader

            Higher-order compromise

            The values square as feedback square

            Explicit and implicit meta-communication

            Competition means dependence

2.     Communication Psychology for Teachers

            Freedom and coercion

            One child’s school experience

            The construction of self-images

            Training the swan perspective

3. Communication Psychology and the Construction of Reality in Intercultural Communication

The ambiguous kiss

Justifying the norm

First- and second-order reality

Understanding versus refutation

III.       The Last Questions

1.     Happiness and Death

            The end of communication

            Self-determination and acceptance of fate

            Vicious and virtuous circles

            The certainty of uncertainty

Searching for Congruence in Communication and Life: An Afterword by Friedemann Schulz von Thun

Selected Bibliography

About the Authors